Winners and losers from ‘Desperate Housewives,’ Season 6, episode 3: ‘Never Judge a Lady by Her Lover’

Can we pleeeeeeeeeeaaaaaase talk about how great this season is?? I won’t lie, this girl was a little skeptical — and I think for good reason. Number one, the fast-forward-five-years thing worked last season of Desperate Housewives, but how would that fit with this one? If it was just a gimmick, then this season probably wouldn’t come close to the awesomeness of last season. And then the first episode didn’t really meet my high hopes. Yet, here we are. Where is here? We’ve got great affairs. We’ve got mystery. We’ve got daughters in comas. We’re back to the story lines that originally made DH as great as it was in its early years: straight soap opera drama.

So you know how it goes. We watch the show, then we pick the winners and losers of the episode. Thanks for all your responses!

WINNERS

Angie: Sure, the Bolens could’ve viciously mass murdered 30 newborns in the middle of the night before they changed their name and moved to Wisteria Lane, but at this point, I’m cool just being in the dark about that. Angie’s a good mother. She’s supporting her son though pretty much anything, as RenatoB says: “That woman will do anything to keep her son from being harmed, including threatening a scorned neighbor with a bat or telling her kid where the loaded Smith ‘n’ Wesson rests.”

The Scavos, sans Lynette: Let’s be real on this one, Tom, Baby Matt Damon, Parker and Penny Scavo get the win because of the writers. Between Baby Matt Damon (1 or 2?) schooling his parents about birth control and making smart decisions, Penny’s great one-liner about not wanting any more brothers and Tom drinking — a lot — to support his wife (finally) and keep her pregnancy secret, these guys won. Big time. @RenatoB picked them, too!!

John: The teenage gardener shtupping the hot, wealthy woman who employs him now has the upper hand. His own restaurant, manipulating Gaby through Carlos, and through it all….Gaby’s still thinking about it. Plus, I know I’ve been keeping this a deep, dark secret, but I lovelovelovelove this story line. Love love love.

LOSERS

Susan: This is her first, but of course not last, appearance as a loser. Susan, we get that you’re upset that Julie’s in a coma. So upset that you decided to attempt to kill someone else’s child, ie, Cheap Knockoff Robert Pattinson. She’s done a lot of stupid things, but never maliciously violent like that. (Not)Neighbor Peggy and I both agreed this was a major out-of-character move for her.

Orson: You guys all picked this one. @LMITCHELL: “Poor, stupid, hateable Orson. He honestly thinks Bree could still love him? Ha.” @RenatoB: “He’s gotta be the dumbest man alive, he needs to get over himself, when is he gonna figure things out?” Couldn’t have said it any better myself, folks. Thanks for the input!!

Carlos: OK. I know a few of you put him on the winner’s list, but here’s why all of the points he gained for putting John into his place were lost: the workplace discrimination. He’s not only doing it, he’s doing it to his friend. Even if she weren’t pregnant, he’s putting her in an awkward position. That said, isn’t this more like the old Carlos…….?

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